Job Title: Santa’s Helper

Salary: Ultimate Job Satisfaction

Location: The Arctic Circle

Reference: C2021

Contact: George Thompson

Telephone: 0141 647 6688

Categories: Production/Technical, International

We have been assigned a big project, and asked to handle it with urgency

A code red alarm has been raised, the North Pole is in a state of emergency

The Omnicrom variant has managed to make its way to Santa’s workshop

They need a whole new workforce fast so Christmas isn’t a total flop

So if you are perhaps looking for some seasonal work at this time of year

There’s no need to look further, your perfect opportunity is right here

The skills gained over your career in production will come to good use

There’s a week left until Christmas and so many presents still to produce

We do have to warn you, hours will be long and you won’t often get a break

This is not a job for the typical millennial, otherwise known as a Snowflake

Equality and human rights are not topics discussed at this work place

There is no one making a stance about gender, religion nor race

Another deterrent for the younger generation is what’s available to eat

Veganism is a foreign concept, all they serve is a plate of gravy and meat

Teas and coffees are accompanied by full fat milk produced by a cow

There is no soya option, or whatever dairy alternative it is they have now

We need someone with a good eye for detail and who makes no mistakes

Would you call yourself a true grafter and think you have what it takes?

Christmas needs saving and we don’t have much time before the big day

So help us get this team together to make presents for Santa’s sleigh  

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